How should I respond when my child says "I hate you"? (ages 5 to 8)

How should I respond when my child says

We are searching data for your request:

Forums and discussions:
Manuals and reference books:
Data from registers:
Wait the end of the search in all databases.
Upon completion, a link will appear to access the found materials.

By the time a child hits school age, he probably has a better handle on his anger and should be acting out less than he did as a preschooler. Even so, he's still likely to lash out verbally now and then — especially about perceived injustices ("Why do I have to go to bed when Adam gets to stay up until nine? I hate you!"). When that happens, he needs your help deciphering his feelings — and dealing with them.

When your grade-schooler blurts, "I hate you!" resist the urge to tell him he doesn't mean it, which belittles his very real feelings. And though you may be tempted to respond with, "Well, I love you," this will only shame him. Instead, label his emotions without judging them: "You seem angry. You really want to stay up longer."

At this age, he's likely to respond with another outburst: "You never let me stay up late!" or "You always make me go to bed at a baby time!" Rather than volley with a knee-jerk, "Yes, I do!" or "No, I don't!" continue to help him articulate his feelings: "You wish you could stay up later. It's hard to go to bed when you know other kids are still up. That's a tough one."

Next, restate your limits, but help him explore his options within those boundaries: "On school nights, your bedtime is at eight — otherwise you won't be rested in the morning. But you can read a book in bed for a little while, or I could read to you. Which would you prefer?"

Although your child's verbal assaults can be hurtful, do your best not to take them personally. After all, he's merely copying what he's seen you and others do in many situations — that is, translating a strong emotion into a simple word: "I hate waiting for the bus!" or "I hate it when the phone rings during dinner!" for example. Most important, remind yourself that your grade-schooler's behavior is normal, and in no way indicates how he really feels about you.

Watch the video: How to Deal with Disrespectful Students. Classroom Management (August 2022).

Video, Sitemap-Video, Sitemap-Videos